You can teach a student a lesson for a day; but if you can teach him to learn by creating curiosity, he will continue the learning process as long as he lives. - Clay P. Bedford

Saturday, March 17, 2012

My Brother Charlie Book Review


I recently picked up a copy of My Brother Charlie for my kids after seeing some rave reviews of it online. Because it was so highly-rated, I didn't even flip through it until I had it home. Mistake.

The very first things that made me say, uh oh, this might not be what I was looking for... were the puzzle pieces scattered on the inside of the book jacket. I know some people like to say that autistic children are little puzzles, but I absolutely detest that metaphor. My child isn't a puzzle, he's a person. Just because he thinks differently and sometimes acts differently than children his age doesn't mean he's a puzzle that needs to be solved. But I wasn't going to let the artwork make my decision on the book. And, as it turns out, it didn't have to.

The general feel of the supposed "acceptance" message in this book felt condescending, like "Yeah, Charlie is broken, but we love him anyway," rather than true acceptance. Granted, the boy in the story was non-verbal, but even that aspect could have had a more positive spin than talking about how Mommy cried because the doctors told her Charlie would never say 'I Love You'. Yes, poor Mommy, because her son isn't going to express love the way she wants him to, to make her feel good. My son didn't need words to express love. I'm fairy certain no one does. I absolutely loathe how the world has such a narrow view of what people should be and how they should act.

In another part of the story, Charlie's sister discusses how he sometimes "ruins" playdates by, well, being himself. Apparently, in his family, needing to be alone and away from people is unacceptable and highly annoying.

Another thing I found abrasive was the statement, "Charlie has autism. But autism doesn't have Charlie." I would expect someone to say this about a disease, like diabetes or cancer. Autism is a neurological difference. Of course it doesn't "have" anyone. That bit reminded me of the horrific I Am Autism video that the deplorable organization Autism Speaks put out not long ago as part of their fear propaganda. It made my skin crawl.

I mean, I don't know. Children are naturally a bit selfish, and maybe that's why the book has those undertones to it. For the purpose of relating. But I thought it was so bad that I didn't even give it to my kids to read, I just took it back.

My position on autism may be different from that of others. For me, my hopes are that my son lives a happy, fulfilling, meaningful, rich life, whatever that means for him. I really don't care about anything else, or anyone else's opinions. I wouldn't change him for anything, because everyone has challenges and this just happens to be the one we deal with.

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