There was yet another school shooting this week, leaving two 12 year-old children wounded and one teacher and the 13 year-old shooter dead. My first thought was, how badly was this child bullied that, at 13, he resorted to murder-suicide? Many others choose to think of him at yet another troubled child, or the handy go-to of gun control.
When I posted about this latest incident, with my opinion that bullying is an epidemic that needs addressed NOW, I had no fewer than five people say to me that kids "need to learn to deal with bullying". Why? Why is it acceptable that children have to learn to endure peer-perpetrated abuse like it's some rite of passage in life? As my husband so aptly said, "Why should we have to play the bullies' game?" Why do the abusers of society get to set the rules, and why don't more people stand up against this scourge on humanity? People do not need to do this, or endure this. It continues because too many people accept it; few are those who are willing to be the proverbial squeaky wheel.
I thought deeply on this after we were offered the opportunity to share my daughter's bullying story with our local news. Did I want to throw our family into the spotlight? No. However, I have always felt a responsibility to share with others what I could when going through difficulties. I have always believed in being a beacon of hope whenever possible. My daughter felt the same calling, so we agreed to the interview.
You can say that bullying exists throughout life, and because of that, kids need to learn early on how to deal with it. My question is always WHY. Why is it acceptable for the bullies to commit peer-perpetrated abuse against their classmates, co-workers, etc., but people who stand up against it are wrong for interfering with the natural order of things? Something is seriously wrong with our society.
Today, my very brave little girl stood up for herself and for others who have been the victims of bullying. Her courage to discuss her own pain said that it is not okay for this to continue, and that those who are being victimized have allies. I am incredibly proud of her for doing this. She is my hero.
Showing posts with label socialization. Show all posts
Showing posts with label socialization. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Scouts
I don't know how I feel about Girl Scouts. I've been debating getting my daughter involved in Scouts for a couple of years now, a consideration which has been more at the forefront of my mind since we began homeschooling last year. I want my children to have as many opportunities to socialize in a healthy environment as they can/want.
I emphasize healthy social opportunities. With this in mind, my feelings on Boy Scouts are much more clear; I don't want my son being part of an organization that openly discriminates against the LGBT community and bans people from leadership positions within the organization based on their orientation. I find it extremely sad that if same-gender couple had a son in Boy Scouts, neither of them could contribute in a leadership role for their son's troop. This goes against the values we are teaching our children (love, acceptance), so I'm not comfortable with his participation in such an organization.
Boy Scouts also takes a firm position on requiring that its participants to follow a religion:
"The Boy Scouts of America maintains that no member can grow into the best kind of citizen without recognizing an obligation to God. In the first part of the Scout Oath or Promise the member declares, ‘On my honor I will do my best to do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law.’ The recognition of God as the ruling and leading power in the universe and the grateful acknowledgment of His favors and blessings are necessary to the best type of citizenship and are wholesome precepts in the education of the growing members."
This bothers me as well. We are not religious people in the traditional sense. I consider myself an Agnostic with Buddhist leanings, but this is more a way of life than a "religion", so to speak. The Boy Scouts of America statement is really offensive to me, because it implies that my children, my husband, and I are not capable of being among the best citizens no matter who we are outside of our beliefs. I have no problem at all with what anyone else believes, but I have a very big problem with others telling me what I or my children must believe, or making judgements about my character based on whether or not I share their faith - or one they approve of.
Girl Scouts does appear to be far more inclusive with their policies. They even allowed transgender member Bobby Montoya to participate. Girl Scouts of Colorado spoke out through GLAAD and released the following statement on transgender youth participating in Girl Scouts:
"If a child identifies as a girl and the child's family presents her as a girl, Girl Scouts of Colorado welcomes her as a Girl Scout."
I was super impressed with this. It made me want to run out and buy a box of Girl Scout cookies. If only the Boy Scouts of America could step out of the stone ages and follow suit. It's 2012, folks.
I'm still on the fence as to whether I want my daughter to participate in Girl Scouts. I've heard there are troops with very religious leanings, and those which tend to be very secular. I'm not sure about the local troop, though I do know that they hold meetings in a church and plaster photos of the girls all over a very public Facebook page. I'm not so comfortable with that, so it seems unlikely. Fortunately, K12 offers opportunities for social interaction. We also have soccer, classes through our community arts centers, and various other ways to stay connected. My kids burn out on socializing fairly quickly anyhow, being on the spectrum, so our needs are less than average to begin with.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
New York Times Targets K12, Online Schools In Severely Biased Article
Since we began learning at home as a family, my daughter has had a couple of rough days. Call it a rough week, even. But compared to having her come home with injuries from bullies, having her self-esteem chipped at on a daily basis, and the fact that she started to develop tummy aches about getting on the bus each day when she used to grin ear to ear every morning anticipating the day she would be old enough to ride that bus to school, I'd call our rough week a mere bump in the road. As for my son, he hasn't had one day of learning at home that I could consider rough. He craves knowledge and literally begs me to continue teaching on weekends, a request I am happy to indulge. I can make choices about the children my children associate with. I'm aware of what they are learning and I can always easily slip curriculum-enriching things into our day. We don't have homework in the traditional sense, so our evenings are family time instead of a mad dash to finish a mountain of homework, take baths, throw down some dinner, and get into bed. And academically, they are excelling. The experience has made us all happier.
Homeschooling has been a wonderful option for us, and I can't say enough good things about K12. But apparently, people feel threatened by school choice (or is it the loss of funds for their districts?) and feel the need to attack online schools. A recent New York Times article was a catalyst for some major misconceptions about K12 and similar schools. I, and many others, took great offense to how K12 and the families enrolled in their school were portrayed.
My daughter attended a bricks and mortar school for two arduous years. While I will quickly admit that her classroom teachers were both excellent - even exceptional, I was profoundly unimpressed by everything else. Perhaps most disturbing was having a school system telling me how - and if - I could parent my own child for the great majority of the day, five days a week, while they failed to do even a mediocre job of protecting her or following their own policies. The lack of predictability, reliability, and safety were major concerns. The only thing predictable about sending my child out that door each day was that, at some point, I was going to get a call about some kid doing some thing to my child. Again.
I'm quite certain that having parents regaining control of their children's lives scares some people in this country to their very cores. Independent thinkers? Oh my. People like that are so much more difficult to control and manipulate, and they tend not to believe everything they're told. They ask questions. That could be bad for those who wish to maintain control over the masses.
The New York Times article, Profits and Questions at Online Charter Schools throws out a real golden nugget of revelation with the statement, "Kids mean money." Wow, really? Anyone with a functioning brain above their stem realizes this as fact, but let's examine how this affects people on a personal level. The article attempts to make it sound like this is some kind of proof that K12 has profits over kids in mind, but I challenge any parent in any school district to take a good hard look and tell me if that isn't true for bricks and mortar schools - to a much greater degree. At public school, my child contributed thousands of dollars each year just by existing there. To her personally, that translated into a sub-standard school environment, heavily-used books and materials, and parents contributing a lot of time and money from our own pockets. On the other hand, I enrolled my children in K12, and I had 100 pounds of brand new school supplies delivered to my door. Free. Yes, free. We paid nothing. I had to go buy a bookshelf to dedicate to just the books, CDs, and DVDs alone, and I had to clear an entire cabinet in the kitchen for all of the science materials, paints, clay, and other materials. And comparatively speaking, my children cost taxpayers much less as homeschoolers than they would if they had continued to attend our local public schools.
The article presents another epic failure of an argument with this little gem: "Current and former staff members of K12 Inc. schools say problems begin with intense recruitment efforts that fail to filter out students who are not suited for the program, which requires strong parental commitment and self-motivated students." Here's a newsflash: any form of education requires strong parental commitment. Whether a child is attending a bricks and mortar school, an online school, a private school, or a traditional homeschool, parental involvement is the number one factor in a child's success. Uninvolved parents who do not participate in their child's education can turn the brightest child with the greatest potential for success into an academic failure with zero motivation, and it happens all the time in public schools.
I'm quite tired of parents being painted as morons who are incapable of contributing to their children's academic success. An Agora teacher paints a profoundly biased picture with the statement, "When you have the television and the Xbox and no parental figure at home, sometimes it’s hard to do your schoolwork." First of all, we don't even own a game console. Second, my children have never been left alone in their lives. And finally, K12 kids are assessed regularly. If they are not making it, there is accountability. We are responsible for making sure our children are progressing; there is not the huge disconnect portrayed in the article. Further, they quote a mother, Mrs. Ubiarco, as saying, "I called the teacher the other day to find out what a simple predicate is...She said it’s the verb. I said why don’t they just say that?" To this I say, wow. You needed to call a teacher for that? Try Google. Better yet, that handy little teacher's guide you get with every course might be helpful, too. The New York Times apparently left out all of the many successful examples of K12 students and found a handful of disgruntled teachers, and a few parents who use videogames to babysit their children, don't know how to tell their child to put the iPod away, and manage their time very poorly to represent our online school. Bias much?
Of our attendance requirements, the same Agora teacher who made the Xbox comment said, "Students need simply to log in to be marked present for the day." While it is true that K12 is not sending someone to the door of each and every homeschooled student each day to be sure each child has pencil to paper, the academic progress and assessments speak for themselves. A child who is not "attending" regularly is not going to meet standards, plain and simple.
And then, because you can't have any good, irrational anti-homeschool argument without bringing the topic of "socialization" into it, the deputy superintendent of Memphis City Schools, Irving Hamer, offered the following: “The early development of children requires lots of interaction with other children for purposes of socialization, developing collaboration and teamwork, and self-definition." Fascinating. Children couldn't possibly garner these skills from, say, Scouts, homeschool co-ops, neighborhood children, friends of the family, siblings, K12's field trips and other opportunities for social development, community sports or classes, or anywhere other than public school? I'd like to inquire as to when children are obtaining these wonderful social skills in school; would it be on the playground, the school bus, or in the lunch room? As far as my personal experience tells me, those are basically the only times children are doing any socializing in bricks and mortar schools - and it is largely unsupervised and where most bullying takes place. Ah, but Mr. Hamer's pompous assertions probably shouldn't surprise me, since a quick Google search revealed that he handles people who disagree with his policies by telling them to "go flip burgers". Nice. I think I'll pass on any social advice he proffers, particularly since Mr. Hamer's degree is in education and not child psychology.
The article (yes, it's quite lengthy) goes on to say that schools like K12 have "aggressive recruitment campaigns". I prefer to view them as awareness campaigns, which are rather necessary with anti-homeschool propaganda such as the New York Times article that prompted this blog post. K12 and schools like it do try to provide many informative opportunities for parents who have been brainwashed into believing that they cannot contribute much to their child's education beyond buying school clothes and supplies, and joining the PTA. Parents need to become aware of how much they really mean to their children in terms of learning and education. I cannot begin to count how many times people say to me, upon learning that I homeschool two advanced learners, "I could never do that." My response is always the same, "Yes, you absolutely could." Any parent with the time and desire to teach their child can teach their child. K12 has amazing teacher support. You are never alone. But public schools do everything they can to convince you that homeschooled children will be socially-awkward, poorly educated nitwits who will never go on to college. K12 has students go on to Harvard. But those students were not included in the Times article. I'd laugh at how utterly ridiculous the Times article is, if I didn't know so many people really believe that.
Is K12 perfect? No. But it's lightyears ahead of bricks and mortar schools in every way, in my opinion. Nothing is perfect. This is a relatively new concept and there will be bumps. Overall, I think this is a wonderful thing. There will always be naysayers who don't like change or who are just too uninformed to make any kind of judgment about this type of education. As for the New York Times, I'm not (nor was I ever) sure why people give that rag so much credibility. The reporting is poor and biased, the stories are highly sensationalized, and I wouldn't use that publication to line my cat's litter pan.
Homeschooling has been a wonderful option for us, and I can't say enough good things about K12. But apparently, people feel threatened by school choice (or is it the loss of funds for their districts?) and feel the need to attack online schools. A recent New York Times article was a catalyst for some major misconceptions about K12 and similar schools. I, and many others, took great offense to how K12 and the families enrolled in their school were portrayed.
My daughter attended a bricks and mortar school for two arduous years. While I will quickly admit that her classroom teachers were both excellent - even exceptional, I was profoundly unimpressed by everything else. Perhaps most disturbing was having a school system telling me how - and if - I could parent my own child for the great majority of the day, five days a week, while they failed to do even a mediocre job of protecting her or following their own policies. The lack of predictability, reliability, and safety were major concerns. The only thing predictable about sending my child out that door each day was that, at some point, I was going to get a call about some kid doing some thing to my child. Again.
I'm quite certain that having parents regaining control of their children's lives scares some people in this country to their very cores. Independent thinkers? Oh my. People like that are so much more difficult to control and manipulate, and they tend not to believe everything they're told. They ask questions. That could be bad for those who wish to maintain control over the masses.
The New York Times article, Profits and Questions at Online Charter Schools throws out a real golden nugget of revelation with the statement, "Kids mean money." Wow, really? Anyone with a functioning brain above their stem realizes this as fact, but let's examine how this affects people on a personal level. The article attempts to make it sound like this is some kind of proof that K12 has profits over kids in mind, but I challenge any parent in any school district to take a good hard look and tell me if that isn't true for bricks and mortar schools - to a much greater degree. At public school, my child contributed thousands of dollars each year just by existing there. To her personally, that translated into a sub-standard school environment, heavily-used books and materials, and parents contributing a lot of time and money from our own pockets. On the other hand, I enrolled my children in K12, and I had 100 pounds of brand new school supplies delivered to my door. Free. Yes, free. We paid nothing. I had to go buy a bookshelf to dedicate to just the books, CDs, and DVDs alone, and I had to clear an entire cabinet in the kitchen for all of the science materials, paints, clay, and other materials. And comparatively speaking, my children cost taxpayers much less as homeschoolers than they would if they had continued to attend our local public schools.
The article presents another epic failure of an argument with this little gem: "Current and former staff members of K12 Inc. schools say problems begin with intense recruitment efforts that fail to filter out students who are not suited for the program, which requires strong parental commitment and self-motivated students." Here's a newsflash: any form of education requires strong parental commitment. Whether a child is attending a bricks and mortar school, an online school, a private school, or a traditional homeschool, parental involvement is the number one factor in a child's success. Uninvolved parents who do not participate in their child's education can turn the brightest child with the greatest potential for success into an academic failure with zero motivation, and it happens all the time in public schools.
I'm quite tired of parents being painted as morons who are incapable of contributing to their children's academic success. An Agora teacher paints a profoundly biased picture with the statement, "When you have the television and the Xbox and no parental figure at home, sometimes it’s hard to do your schoolwork." First of all, we don't even own a game console. Second, my children have never been left alone in their lives. And finally, K12 kids are assessed regularly. If they are not making it, there is accountability. We are responsible for making sure our children are progressing; there is not the huge disconnect portrayed in the article. Further, they quote a mother, Mrs. Ubiarco, as saying, "I called the teacher the other day to find out what a simple predicate is...She said it’s the verb. I said why don’t they just say that?" To this I say, wow. You needed to call a teacher for that? Try Google. Better yet, that handy little teacher's guide you get with every course might be helpful, too. The New York Times apparently left out all of the many successful examples of K12 students and found a handful of disgruntled teachers, and a few parents who use videogames to babysit their children, don't know how to tell their child to put the iPod away, and manage their time very poorly to represent our online school. Bias much?
Of our attendance requirements, the same Agora teacher who made the Xbox comment said, "Students need simply to log in to be marked present for the day." While it is true that K12 is not sending someone to the door of each and every homeschooled student each day to be sure each child has pencil to paper, the academic progress and assessments speak for themselves. A child who is not "attending" regularly is not going to meet standards, plain and simple.
And then, because you can't have any good, irrational anti-homeschool argument without bringing the topic of "socialization" into it, the deputy superintendent of Memphis City Schools, Irving Hamer, offered the following: “The early development of children requires lots of interaction with other children for purposes of socialization, developing collaboration and teamwork, and self-definition." Fascinating. Children couldn't possibly garner these skills from, say, Scouts, homeschool co-ops, neighborhood children, friends of the family, siblings, K12's field trips and other opportunities for social development, community sports or classes, or anywhere other than public school? I'd like to inquire as to when children are obtaining these wonderful social skills in school; would it be on the playground, the school bus, or in the lunch room? As far as my personal experience tells me, those are basically the only times children are doing any socializing in bricks and mortar schools - and it is largely unsupervised and where most bullying takes place. Ah, but Mr. Hamer's pompous assertions probably shouldn't surprise me, since a quick Google search revealed that he handles people who disagree with his policies by telling them to "go flip burgers". Nice. I think I'll pass on any social advice he proffers, particularly since Mr. Hamer's degree is in education and not child psychology.
The article (yes, it's quite lengthy) goes on to say that schools like K12 have "aggressive recruitment campaigns". I prefer to view them as awareness campaigns, which are rather necessary with anti-homeschool propaganda such as the New York Times article that prompted this blog post. K12 and schools like it do try to provide many informative opportunities for parents who have been brainwashed into believing that they cannot contribute much to their child's education beyond buying school clothes and supplies, and joining the PTA. Parents need to become aware of how much they really mean to their children in terms of learning and education. I cannot begin to count how many times people say to me, upon learning that I homeschool two advanced learners, "I could never do that." My response is always the same, "Yes, you absolutely could." Any parent with the time and desire to teach their child can teach their child. K12 has amazing teacher support. You are never alone. But public schools do everything they can to convince you that homeschooled children will be socially-awkward, poorly educated nitwits who will never go on to college. K12 has students go on to Harvard. But those students were not included in the Times article. I'd laugh at how utterly ridiculous the Times article is, if I didn't know so many people really believe that.
Is K12 perfect? No. But it's lightyears ahead of bricks and mortar schools in every way, in my opinion. Nothing is perfect. This is a relatively new concept and there will be bumps. Overall, I think this is a wonderful thing. There will always be naysayers who don't like change or who are just too uninformed to make any kind of judgment about this type of education. As for the New York Times, I'm not (nor was I ever) sure why people give that rag so much credibility. The reporting is poor and biased, the stories are highly sensationalized, and I wouldn't use that publication to line my cat's litter pan.
Saturday, November 5, 2011
A Closed Discussion
Going into the homeschooling adventure, I had sort of steeled myself for the inevitable judgments and misconceptions I was sure I would face for the decision to remove my children from public school. The majority support I received was a huge surprise; with very little exception, the reactions have been very positive. That is, unless you count the people in our former school district.
What I didn't expect was the reaction I got from a friend of 17 years, with whom I have always been able to talk about anything. When I first mentioned, in response to why I haven't had a lot of time for friends lately, that I had been busy teaching my children, I got no response at all. We were chatting online at that time, and I didn't think much of it. The abrupt silence did make me wonder, but I'm not one to create problems where none exist.
Recently, when I did have a few minutes to myself and we talked on the phone, our conversation moved into the realm of what we've been doing lately. I said, "Same as I said before, I've been keeping very busy teaching the kids. It's time-consuming, but they love it and so do I." Again there was no response, so I said, "I'm getting a vibe here. You seem to go silent when I mention homeschooling." I mentioned our online conversation. The response was, "Yeah, I just don't agree with it." The implied was that there would be no discussing homeschooling. And it just didn't sit well with me.
For 17 years, my friend and I have agreed and disagreed on many things. I accept my friend, despite some things (i.e. judging others, selfishness, narrow thinking) I may not necessarily care for. Overall, I consider my friend to be a good person and I realize that people experience and view the world differently. So I have to admit that it bothers me more than a little that homeschooling is a closed topic. We've never had a closed topic. We've been able to have disagreements, wildly different opinions, and even arguments throughout the time we've known each other. I am not opposed to hearing a good counterpoint from my friend, but the anti-homeschooling sentiment seems to have no basis whatsoever. If there were reasons, or even just one single tiny reason, I would listen and do my best to understand. But I have been refused that opportunity.
My friend's refusal to even disagree with me feels highly critical and judgmental; even strangers who disagree with my choices will at least debate me or provide a reason for their disagreement. It seems extremely stifling and unfair that my friend can talk for hours about life and work, or anything that comes to mind, while I am essentially forbidden to discuss teaching my children and the wonderful benefits (like my son being a full grade level ahead in Math, Phonics, and Language Arts, or the confidence that is returning in my daughter after being free from the bullying she endured during her two years of public school). I hesitate to discuss anything which might lead into the topic of school or learning. Or, at this point, anything at all. My friend has absolutely no experience with homeschooling, and does not have nor want children. That makes this silent criticism even worse.
Why am I sharing this? Aside from the fact that it's cathartic to get these thoughts out of my head, this story also illustrates some of the utterly mindless and hurtful reactions some people have to homeschoolers. While I can only guess the basis for my friend's extreme distaste for homeschooling is related to the myth that children need public schools to 'become socialized', I can say with certainty that these misconceptions really need to go. The only way they ever will is if people talk and others listen. I will continue to talk about homeschooling.
And if you've read this far, thank you for listening.
What I didn't expect was the reaction I got from a friend of 17 years, with whom I have always been able to talk about anything. When I first mentioned, in response to why I haven't had a lot of time for friends lately, that I had been busy teaching my children, I got no response at all. We were chatting online at that time, and I didn't think much of it. The abrupt silence did make me wonder, but I'm not one to create problems where none exist.
Recently, when I did have a few minutes to myself and we talked on the phone, our conversation moved into the realm of what we've been doing lately. I said, "Same as I said before, I've been keeping very busy teaching the kids. It's time-consuming, but they love it and so do I." Again there was no response, so I said, "I'm getting a vibe here. You seem to go silent when I mention homeschooling." I mentioned our online conversation. The response was, "Yeah, I just don't agree with it." The implied was that there would be no discussing homeschooling. And it just didn't sit well with me.
For 17 years, my friend and I have agreed and disagreed on many things. I accept my friend, despite some things (i.e. judging others, selfishness, narrow thinking) I may not necessarily care for. Overall, I consider my friend to be a good person and I realize that people experience and view the world differently. So I have to admit that it bothers me more than a little that homeschooling is a closed topic. We've never had a closed topic. We've been able to have disagreements, wildly different opinions, and even arguments throughout the time we've known each other. I am not opposed to hearing a good counterpoint from my friend, but the anti-homeschooling sentiment seems to have no basis whatsoever. If there were reasons, or even just one single tiny reason, I would listen and do my best to understand. But I have been refused that opportunity.
My friend's refusal to even disagree with me feels highly critical and judgmental; even strangers who disagree with my choices will at least debate me or provide a reason for their disagreement. It seems extremely stifling and unfair that my friend can talk for hours about life and work, or anything that comes to mind, while I am essentially forbidden to discuss teaching my children and the wonderful benefits (like my son being a full grade level ahead in Math, Phonics, and Language Arts, or the confidence that is returning in my daughter after being free from the bullying she endured during her two years of public school). I hesitate to discuss anything which might lead into the topic of school or learning. Or, at this point, anything at all. My friend has absolutely no experience with homeschooling, and does not have nor want children. That makes this silent criticism even worse.
Why am I sharing this? Aside from the fact that it's cathartic to get these thoughts out of my head, this story also illustrates some of the utterly mindless and hurtful reactions some people have to homeschoolers. While I can only guess the basis for my friend's extreme distaste for homeschooling is related to the myth that children need public schools to 'become socialized', I can say with certainty that these misconceptions really need to go. The only way they ever will is if people talk and others listen. I will continue to talk about homeschooling.
And if you've read this far, thank you for listening.
Monday, October 17, 2011
What I Believe (and don't) About Homeschooling
I don't believe that public schools are terrible places, or that the children in them are doomed to lives of misery and bullying. And I don't believe that all or even most homeschooling families are religious freaks, social outcasts, or unsocialized weirdos. Are there some? Well, sure. But it is unfair to judge all homeschooling families based on stereotypes about a few sensationalized situations we hear about in the news or through the grapevine. There are religious freaks, social outcasts, and unsocialized weirdos in schools, too!
I do not believe that public school offers children the socialization they "need". The socialization which children receive at school is largely comprised of things we'd prefer they were not exposed to. And by 'we', I mean most parents, not just homeschoolers. Until the 1840s, compulsory education did not exist in the United States; education was something done in the home and society functioned just fine. In fact, people were quite displeased with the idea of compulsory education! But I don't believe that children should be shielded completely from the outside world; that's just nuts. However, some bits of knowledge can wait.
I do not believe that homeschooling is always the better option. In fact, I think public school is sometimes the better option. Each family needs to assess their individual needs and values and make decisions that are best for their situation.
I do believe that learning about diversity and other cultures is important. I do not believe that public schools, at least where we reside, teach children anything about diversity and other cultures. College will probably be the first place they truly experience this. The most important thing now is to teach tolerance and acceptance of differences. And that will quite likely not be learned in any public school. In fact, I've witnessed quite the opposite.
I do not believe that bullying is some rite of passage that all children must go through, or that children need to go to public school to "learn how to deal with it". Bullying is not a harmless childhood experience, nor is it something that is a critical or healthy part of their development; bullying leads to poor self-esteem, academic failure, drop outs, a lifetime of trust issues, and even suicide. Though a lot of schools talk a good talk about bullying prevention and zero tolerance of such behavior, I've found that lip service is far too frequently as far as it goes. More often than not, schools fail to protect children who are targeted and fail to discipline children who are the perpetrators of bullying. It seems that children are viewed as almost inhuman by schools, with comments such as, "Oh, it's just kid stuff." If adults were subjected to the same treatment by their peers, it would be called stalking, harassment, or abuse, and criminal charges and restraining orders would be ways of dealing with the perpetrators. But when this happens to children, who are far less capable of dealing with these things emotionally and are still developing their sense of who they are in this world, the consequences can be utterly devastating for the victim and schools often dismiss it as child's play.
There are no bullies walking our hallways.
I do believe that all parents are teachers, from the moment their babies come into this world. I also believe that compulsory education and the sheeple mentality it drills into all of us has most parents convinced that they are completely unfit to be teachers. "I couldn't do it," is the most common thing people say to me when I tell them I am homeschooling my children. My response is always, "You absolutely could." It saddens me that parents, who are their children's first and most important teachers, do not see themselves as such. Homeschooling is not a new invention or some wild idea, but a natural continuation of a process already well underway since a child was born. Parents don't have to become teachers to homeschool their children, they already are teachers.
I do not believe that public school offers children the socialization they "need". The socialization which children receive at school is largely comprised of things we'd prefer they were not exposed to. And by 'we', I mean most parents, not just homeschoolers. Until the 1840s, compulsory education did not exist in the United States; education was something done in the home and society functioned just fine. In fact, people were quite displeased with the idea of compulsory education! But I don't believe that children should be shielded completely from the outside world; that's just nuts. However, some bits of knowledge can wait.
I do not believe that homeschooling is always the better option. In fact, I think public school is sometimes the better option. Each family needs to assess their individual needs and values and make decisions that are best for their situation.
I do believe that learning about diversity and other cultures is important. I do not believe that public schools, at least where we reside, teach children anything about diversity and other cultures. College will probably be the first place they truly experience this. The most important thing now is to teach tolerance and acceptance of differences. And that will quite likely not be learned in any public school. In fact, I've witnessed quite the opposite.
I do not believe that bullying is some rite of passage that all children must go through, or that children need to go to public school to "learn how to deal with it". Bullying is not a harmless childhood experience, nor is it something that is a critical or healthy part of their development; bullying leads to poor self-esteem, academic failure, drop outs, a lifetime of trust issues, and even suicide. Though a lot of schools talk a good talk about bullying prevention and zero tolerance of such behavior, I've found that lip service is far too frequently as far as it goes. More often than not, schools fail to protect children who are targeted and fail to discipline children who are the perpetrators of bullying. It seems that children are viewed as almost inhuman by schools, with comments such as, "Oh, it's just kid stuff." If adults were subjected to the same treatment by their peers, it would be called stalking, harassment, or abuse, and criminal charges and restraining orders would be ways of dealing with the perpetrators. But when this happens to children, who are far less capable of dealing with these things emotionally and are still developing their sense of who they are in this world, the consequences can be utterly devastating for the victim and schools often dismiss it as child's play.
There are no bullies walking our hallways.
I do believe that all parents are teachers, from the moment their babies come into this world. I also believe that compulsory education and the sheeple mentality it drills into all of us has most parents convinced that they are completely unfit to be teachers. "I couldn't do it," is the most common thing people say to me when I tell them I am homeschooling my children. My response is always, "You absolutely could." It saddens me that parents, who are their children's first and most important teachers, do not see themselves as such. Homeschooling is not a new invention or some wild idea, but a natural continuation of a process already well underway since a child was born. Parents don't have to become teachers to homeschool their children, they already are teachers.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Socializing, Part II: Bullying and Popularity
It might surprise many people to know that I believe my children will receive more social benefits from being homeschooled (see my previous post here). What probably won't surprise them is my concern about the growing epidemic of bullying in our public schools. Overcrowded schools with kids who bully and teachers who don't care and administrators who don't do their jobs are more common, both in my experience and what I gather from others, that most any of us would be comfortable with if we allowed ourselves to think about it. The impact of bullying and very real psychological damage done by the less fabulous social aspects of public school is downplayed severely. "Over 14 percent of high school students have considered suicide, and almost 7 percent have attempted it," according to BullyingStatistics.org, and a British study (available at the same site) says that about half of suicides among young people are due to bullying. Further, consider that 1 in 4 children are bullied, and only about 58% report it. Those are some sobering statistics. Bullying-related suicide deaths are a growing epidemic in our country. Meanwhile, I have never heard of a child committing suicide because they were homeschooled.
In the two years my daughter was in preschool, and the one year my son attended, they were not bullied even once. They loved school and looked forward to going. But there were key differences between preschool and elementary school; a smaller teacher to student ratio (1:8), more structure, and very little random free time. Classes were 3x weekly for a couple of hours, and we all received a detailed typed report of everything the children had done that day and what they would be doing next time.
Elementary school was like jumping into a cold pool for me; the shock was palpable. There were no more detailed communications of what my daughter was doing, the days were much longer and 5 days/week, and there were bullies. Bullies on the bus, bullies in the lunch room, bullies on the playground, bullies from other classes, and even a bully for a gym teacher who went so far as to tell lies about my child to justify her poor handling of R's sensory struggles with noise and disorganized movement. My daughter, just by the end of Kindergarten, had rock snowballs thrown at her face, had a peer spit in her face at lunchtime because my daughter simply wanted to be her friend, was injured by a boy she didn't even know 'because he felt like it', was verbally and physically bullied on the bus, and became so upset about the happenings on the bus that she asked me to start driving her to school. That was quite significant, since she had spent years watching the bus do morning and afternoon runs by our home with great anticipation of the day she could finally ride it.
But it's not just bullying; it can also be compromising who you are to be part of the in crowd. The characteristics that will get you ahead in life are not typically the ones valued by peers. In fact, they just might make you a target. We need only look to the popular television shows on Nickelodeon to see what matters to school-age children. Spoiled, entitled behavior is rampant, elementary students are walking around texting with their own cell phones, and everyone is keeping up with the Jones'. A boy who is good at sports or a girl who has great hair and brand name clothes is far more likely to get positive feedback from peers than they would for being in honors math or being accepted to Yale.
Highly intelligent students typically have different priorities and interests. For some, this doesn't affect their social lives, but for many it does. If you don't see that easily at first glance, it is probably because there are many highly intelligent children not living up to their potential because school is a hostile environment for them, or because they have such a desire to fit in and be accepted that they make that their priority. I don't want my children to ever feel like their education has to include a popularity contest, or that they have to sacrifice who they are to be accepted.
Catch-all statements like "kids need to go to [public] school" are frustrating to me. I choose to homeschool my children, but I would never say that all kids need to be homeschooled. I simply don't believe either statement is true. Public school was okay, when you balance the positives (wonderful teachers) and negatives (bullying, family disconnect). But it was just okay. And I want better for my children than "okay".
In the two years my daughter was in preschool, and the one year my son attended, they were not bullied even once. They loved school and looked forward to going. But there were key differences between preschool and elementary school; a smaller teacher to student ratio (1:8), more structure, and very little random free time. Classes were 3x weekly for a couple of hours, and we all received a detailed typed report of everything the children had done that day and what they would be doing next time.
Elementary school was like jumping into a cold pool for me; the shock was palpable. There were no more detailed communications of what my daughter was doing, the days were much longer and 5 days/week, and there were bullies. Bullies on the bus, bullies in the lunch room, bullies on the playground, bullies from other classes, and even a bully for a gym teacher who went so far as to tell lies about my child to justify her poor handling of R's sensory struggles with noise and disorganized movement. My daughter, just by the end of Kindergarten, had rock snowballs thrown at her face, had a peer spit in her face at lunchtime because my daughter simply wanted to be her friend, was injured by a boy she didn't even know 'because he felt like it', was verbally and physically bullied on the bus, and became so upset about the happenings on the bus that she asked me to start driving her to school. That was quite significant, since she had spent years watching the bus do morning and afternoon runs by our home with great anticipation of the day she could finally ride it.
But it's not just bullying; it can also be compromising who you are to be part of the in crowd. The characteristics that will get you ahead in life are not typically the ones valued by peers. In fact, they just might make you a target. We need only look to the popular television shows on Nickelodeon to see what matters to school-age children. Spoiled, entitled behavior is rampant, elementary students are walking around texting with their own cell phones, and everyone is keeping up with the Jones'. A boy who is good at sports or a girl who has great hair and brand name clothes is far more likely to get positive feedback from peers than they would for being in honors math or being accepted to Yale.
Highly intelligent students typically have different priorities and interests. For some, this doesn't affect their social lives, but for many it does. If you don't see that easily at first glance, it is probably because there are many highly intelligent children not living up to their potential because school is a hostile environment for them, or because they have such a desire to fit in and be accepted that they make that their priority. I don't want my children to ever feel like their education has to include a popularity contest, or that they have to sacrifice who they are to be accepted.
Catch-all statements like "kids need to go to [public] school" are frustrating to me. I choose to homeschool my children, but I would never say that all kids need to be homeschooled. I simply don't believe either statement is true. Public school was okay, when you balance the positives (wonderful teachers) and negatives (bullying, family disconnect). But it was just okay. And I want better for my children than "okay".
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Socializing, Part I: People of All Ages
This is part one of a two-part post about my thoughts on homeschooling, public schools, and socialization. This is probably the the number one topic homeschoolers are confronted with by critics and concerned friends and relatives, and it is also something I believe is quite misunderstood. Thus, I have a lot to say about this, and probably will have much more to say in future posts.
Critics of homeschoolers are often quick to cite proper socialization as a reason children should be shipped off to public school. Interestingly, very few people ever mention the quality of education homeschooled children will receive! For a society so concerned with socializing our children, one might think we would be equally concerned with the quality of those social interactions. But quality doesn't seem to enter the equation, ever. And I find that sad, and a little disturbing.
I don't necessarily believe that those who tout the social skills development benefits of public school really think about what they are saying. How many people truly believe that a group of 15 or 20 age-matched children can provide social skills and values adequately and appropriately for their child? Yes, I added values in there, because anyone who thinks their values at home will automatically override the values of those their children spend most of their waking hours with is likely in for unpleasant surprises ahead. I'm not saying it cannot be accomplished, but it takes an incredible amount of parental effort and involvement that I am not sure is present within the 'let the schools take care of it' mentality.
As a child, I lived in an apartment complex for the first 9 years of my life which was basically a retirement community. Most of my interactions were with much, much older adults. I delighted in playing violin, reading stories, or talking for hours over cocoa with my elderly neighbors, and enjoyed playing with grandchildren of all ages when they would visit. As a result of that experience, socially interacting with people of all ages, I was able to relate to people of all ages with confidence. And, for that matter, with interest. Age barriers became more blurred for me, and I simply saw people as people. It was actually my age-matched peers who proved most difficult, and had they been my only, or even the majority of my social exposure, I don't believe that would have been positive for me in the least. I want my children to interact with children and adults of all ages who are positive influences, and feel comfortable doing so. After all, in the real, post-school world, they will always be interacting with people of all ages.
This isn't to say some public school options don't offer such opportunities, but for the most part there is a very sharp cutoff between adults and children, and even between children in different grades. I never understood that, nor do I think it is particularly healthy. We are all people, and I often did not feel like a person in school; or at least, not a person with rights or respect. Sure, putting first graders with fifth graders on the playground with minimal supervision can be disastrous, but why not involve them all together in structured activities? Our local elementary did some of that, by having fourth grade students read to the Kindergartners; however, I feel that it still fostered the 'I am above you, imparting knowledge to you', one-directional way of education.
While public school is certainly the preferred route for some families whose children thrive there and truly have a positive experience, those children are not representative of all children. By nature, we are all different, and we cannot expect a cookie cutter education to work for every child. Given the very same curriculum, environment, peer group, and teachers, two students can have wildly different experiences and outcomes. I do my very best to understand my children, to consider life from their perspective. I ask a lot of questions about how they think and feel about things and ask for their feedback on family decisions. It is my belief that they should feel valued, always, and I'm not confident that most schools offer this sort of environment.
Until my next post, here are just a few of the ways homeschooled children can really enjoy very active and healthy social lives:
Critics of homeschoolers are often quick to cite proper socialization as a reason children should be shipped off to public school. Interestingly, very few people ever mention the quality of education homeschooled children will receive! For a society so concerned with socializing our children, one might think we would be equally concerned with the quality of those social interactions. But quality doesn't seem to enter the equation, ever. And I find that sad, and a little disturbing.
I don't necessarily believe that those who tout the social skills development benefits of public school really think about what they are saying. How many people truly believe that a group of 15 or 20 age-matched children can provide social skills and values adequately and appropriately for their child? Yes, I added values in there, because anyone who thinks their values at home will automatically override the values of those their children spend most of their waking hours with is likely in for unpleasant surprises ahead. I'm not saying it cannot be accomplished, but it takes an incredible amount of parental effort and involvement that I am not sure is present within the 'let the schools take care of it' mentality.
As a child, I lived in an apartment complex for the first 9 years of my life which was basically a retirement community. Most of my interactions were with much, much older adults. I delighted in playing violin, reading stories, or talking for hours over cocoa with my elderly neighbors, and enjoyed playing with grandchildren of all ages when they would visit. As a result of that experience, socially interacting with people of all ages, I was able to relate to people of all ages with confidence. And, for that matter, with interest. Age barriers became more blurred for me, and I simply saw people as people. It was actually my age-matched peers who proved most difficult, and had they been my only, or even the majority of my social exposure, I don't believe that would have been positive for me in the least. I want my children to interact with children and adults of all ages who are positive influences, and feel comfortable doing so. After all, in the real, post-school world, they will always be interacting with people of all ages.
This isn't to say some public school options don't offer such opportunities, but for the most part there is a very sharp cutoff between adults and children, and even between children in different grades. I never understood that, nor do I think it is particularly healthy. We are all people, and I often did not feel like a person in school; or at least, not a person with rights or respect. Sure, putting first graders with fifth graders on the playground with minimal supervision can be disastrous, but why not involve them all together in structured activities? Our local elementary did some of that, by having fourth grade students read to the Kindergartners; however, I feel that it still fostered the 'I am above you, imparting knowledge to you', one-directional way of education.
While public school is certainly the preferred route for some families whose children thrive there and truly have a positive experience, those children are not representative of all children. By nature, we are all different, and we cannot expect a cookie cutter education to work for every child. Given the very same curriculum, environment, peer group, and teachers, two students can have wildly different experiences and outcomes. I do my very best to understand my children, to consider life from their perspective. I ask a lot of questions about how they think and feel about things and ask for their feedback on family decisions. It is my belief that they should feel valued, always, and I'm not confident that most schools offer this sort of environment.
Until my next post, here are just a few of the ways homeschooled children can really enjoy very active and healthy social lives:
- Scouts
- Library groups
- Community volunteering
- YMCA
- Homeschool groups
- Arts centers
- Dance classes
- Gymnastics
- Martial arts
- 4-H
- Community sports teams (soccer, baseball, softball, etc.)
- Local common interest groups (painting, collecting things, etc.)
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Homeschool Pros and Cons
I thought I would make a list of the things I feel very positive about as we look forward to this homeschool journey, and also a list of the things I have fears or concerns about. Positive list first!
Speech
G's speech has come so far from the days when we needed sign language for him to be able to communicate his most basic needs. His speech therapist was a miracle, and I did my best to supplement at home. I incorporated speech activities into everything from reading books to silly games I made up. Sometimes he knew he was working on his words, but most times he just thought he was having fun. What I love about the homeschooling option for G is that I can slip speech exercises right into learning about otherwise unrelated subject matter. He would not be getting that in public school. In fact, they would pull him out of his regular classes for speech, which would not only interrupt his academic schedule but also draw undue attention to him. I don't like either of those issues. And no matter how good their therapist is, no one knows his specific needs better than me, because I live with him and have been actively working to understand and help him from the time he was a baby.
Physical Education
Mostly, I think PE in schools is a joke, and not a funny one. With sensory and focus issues, a loud gym class filled with unruly Kindergartners, bright florescent lights, and lots of unpredictable movement would more than likely lead to misery, meltdowns, and extreme difficulty finding focus afterward to complete the rest of his academic day. I have some experience on this; it's not mere conjecture. I took him to a restaurant a few weeks ago where there was loud music and a lot of people moving around, and it literally took three days to get him balanced out after that. He was an overstimulated mess. Which brings me to my next issue.
Sensory Diet
At home, I can work on G's sensory diet as needed. In school, they can offer him OT (Occupational Therapy) services, but again, they are not going to be able to do as well as I can with him because I know him, and I know what produces results fast and predictably. And I can implement this as needed through his academic day, where asking his teachers to do that would be a bit of a reach. "Oh, by the way, Mrs. P., when G gets really overstimulated, you can calm him down within five minutes with tight hugs or by wrapping him up like a burrito in a blanket." Teachers just don't have the time or resources to offer than kind of individual attention in a classroom of 20 students. The other benefit is that I can monitor his progress more accurately, and the goal I am working toward is where his sensory diet includes things he can do himself to work through those times of near-meltdown. At age 5, he simply hasn't mastered it yet.
Format, Media and Environment
G loves computers, electronics, anything with buttons. He will be doing a lot of work online for his homeschooling. We can also make use of programs on PBS kids for supplemental material, trips out into the world for some hands-on experience with what we are talking about in his curriculum, and resources on the internet including educational games and YouTube's plethora of videos on just about anything you can possibly dream up. I rather like the idea of talking about history and taking a trip to a museum, or discussing the patterns of weather and actually going outside to experience it during our discussion, or going on a walk and using found objects for the day's art or science work.
Quality Time
Some parents look eagerly forward to the time their children will spend in school, away from home, affording them some free time. I have never been one of those parents. I cried after the bus left for the first few days of Kindergarten and first grade, and though my tears eventually stopped falling, the feeling of sending my daughter away for 8 hours a day just never felt right. It is not that I don't believe that developing independence is an important, perhaps critical, phase of childhood development, it's that it's such a substantial chunk of the day. I value a close family, and it seems like the traditional methods of schooling tear at the threads of the family fabric. There is such a disconnect. Further, I truly enjoy being involved in my children's learning experiences. And, well, I don't necessarily appreciate some of the things they are exposed to in public school, from bullying to some seriously wrecked (or completely absent) value systems. While first grade was nearly bully-free, Kindergarten was a nightmare of verbal and physical bullying - and the 'education' my daughter received went way beyond the classroom and my comfort level. With homeschooling, there are still plenty of social opportunities, from art classes to scouts to homeschool field trips - and we have more control over who our children interact with and what is done when problems arise.
Alrighty, then. Now, on to that less pleasant list of things that worry me.
Doing It Right
The big, looming question is...what if I screw up? I think I covered my anxieties about homeschooling fairly well in my previous post, so I won't repeat myself here. Simply stated, I worry myself about the logistics. Am I up for the challenge? This isn't a birthday party, a hairstyle, or room decor - it's their education. I place great importance on education. And while my brain tells me that homeschooling - especially in the format I've chosen after much research - is far more beneficial, I do have my own self-doubts to deal with. It is a tremendous responsibility.
Socializing
I know, I know. This is probably not as big an issue as many people make of it. Really, the only time kids are doing a lot of socializing in school is on the bus, on the playground, and in the lunch room. In reality, they would get much more interaction in personally arranged play dates, community art classes, library groups, and homeschool get-togethers. Most socialization takes place within the family. Of course, the familiarity of being with their public school peers builds a bond among friends, but it appears rare that these people end up being part of our lives once we reach adulthood anyway. More often, it is our college friends, colleagues, and 'mommy friends' who stick with us later on. I have one friend I remain in contact with from high school. The rest of my friends I met through my chosen activities, work, college, or my community. Or Facebook! Ha! But anyway, perhaps because people mention it constantly, this topic does still kind of get to me.
I guess this means my list of positives greatly overshadows the list of not-so-positives. Which I already knew, and it is why I decided to homeschool my son for sure and why I am considering homeschooling R as well. But with just over a month to go, the nerves are working overtime!
Speech
G's speech has come so far from the days when we needed sign language for him to be able to communicate his most basic needs. His speech therapist was a miracle, and I did my best to supplement at home. I incorporated speech activities into everything from reading books to silly games I made up. Sometimes he knew he was working on his words, but most times he just thought he was having fun. What I love about the homeschooling option for G is that I can slip speech exercises right into learning about otherwise unrelated subject matter. He would not be getting that in public school. In fact, they would pull him out of his regular classes for speech, which would not only interrupt his academic schedule but also draw undue attention to him. I don't like either of those issues. And no matter how good their therapist is, no one knows his specific needs better than me, because I live with him and have been actively working to understand and help him from the time he was a baby.
Physical Education
Mostly, I think PE in schools is a joke, and not a funny one. With sensory and focus issues, a loud gym class filled with unruly Kindergartners, bright florescent lights, and lots of unpredictable movement would more than likely lead to misery, meltdowns, and extreme difficulty finding focus afterward to complete the rest of his academic day. I have some experience on this; it's not mere conjecture. I took him to a restaurant a few weeks ago where there was loud music and a lot of people moving around, and it literally took three days to get him balanced out after that. He was an overstimulated mess. Which brings me to my next issue.
Sensory Diet
At home, I can work on G's sensory diet as needed. In school, they can offer him OT (Occupational Therapy) services, but again, they are not going to be able to do as well as I can with him because I know him, and I know what produces results fast and predictably. And I can implement this as needed through his academic day, where asking his teachers to do that would be a bit of a reach. "Oh, by the way, Mrs. P., when G gets really overstimulated, you can calm him down within five minutes with tight hugs or by wrapping him up like a burrito in a blanket." Teachers just don't have the time or resources to offer than kind of individual attention in a classroom of 20 students. The other benefit is that I can monitor his progress more accurately, and the goal I am working toward is where his sensory diet includes things he can do himself to work through those times of near-meltdown. At age 5, he simply hasn't mastered it yet.
Format, Media and Environment
G loves computers, electronics, anything with buttons. He will be doing a lot of work online for his homeschooling. We can also make use of programs on PBS kids for supplemental material, trips out into the world for some hands-on experience with what we are talking about in his curriculum, and resources on the internet including educational games and YouTube's plethora of videos on just about anything you can possibly dream up. I rather like the idea of talking about history and taking a trip to a museum, or discussing the patterns of weather and actually going outside to experience it during our discussion, or going on a walk and using found objects for the day's art or science work.
Quality Time
Some parents look eagerly forward to the time their children will spend in school, away from home, affording them some free time. I have never been one of those parents. I cried after the bus left for the first few days of Kindergarten and first grade, and though my tears eventually stopped falling, the feeling of sending my daughter away for 8 hours a day just never felt right. It is not that I don't believe that developing independence is an important, perhaps critical, phase of childhood development, it's that it's such a substantial chunk of the day. I value a close family, and it seems like the traditional methods of schooling tear at the threads of the family fabric. There is such a disconnect. Further, I truly enjoy being involved in my children's learning experiences. And, well, I don't necessarily appreciate some of the things they are exposed to in public school, from bullying to some seriously wrecked (or completely absent) value systems. While first grade was nearly bully-free, Kindergarten was a nightmare of verbal and physical bullying - and the 'education' my daughter received went way beyond the classroom and my comfort level. With homeschooling, there are still plenty of social opportunities, from art classes to scouts to homeschool field trips - and we have more control over who our children interact with and what is done when problems arise.
Alrighty, then. Now, on to that less pleasant list of things that worry me.
Doing It Right
The big, looming question is...what if I screw up? I think I covered my anxieties about homeschooling fairly well in my previous post, so I won't repeat myself here. Simply stated, I worry myself about the logistics. Am I up for the challenge? This isn't a birthday party, a hairstyle, or room decor - it's their education. I place great importance on education. And while my brain tells me that homeschooling - especially in the format I've chosen after much research - is far more beneficial, I do have my own self-doubts to deal with. It is a tremendous responsibility.
Socializing
I know, I know. This is probably not as big an issue as many people make of it. Really, the only time kids are doing a lot of socializing in school is on the bus, on the playground, and in the lunch room. In reality, they would get much more interaction in personally arranged play dates, community art classes, library groups, and homeschool get-togethers. Most socialization takes place within the family. Of course, the familiarity of being with their public school peers builds a bond among friends, but it appears rare that these people end up being part of our lives once we reach adulthood anyway. More often, it is our college friends, colleagues, and 'mommy friends' who stick with us later on. I have one friend I remain in contact with from high school. The rest of my friends I met through my chosen activities, work, college, or my community. Or Facebook! Ha! But anyway, perhaps because people mention it constantly, this topic does still kind of get to me.
I guess this means my list of positives greatly overshadows the list of not-so-positives. Which I already knew, and it is why I decided to homeschool my son for sure and why I am considering homeschooling R as well. But with just over a month to go, the nerves are working overtime!
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